For several months now I noticed God working on me in certain areas in my life. The one area I
now see him at work is "Love".
I have always seen myself as a loving person. I forgive quickly and tend to forget a little faster than most, or at least I thought I did.
It seems every time I turn around "Love" is the the lesson that is brought before me again and again.
I don't hold grudges......maybe they are hidden so deep in my heart I don't see them.
Yes Lord I see them now.
I don't believe I allow my hurt feelings to overcome me.....Ok there are times that I have.
Yes Lord I feel them still.
What I thought in the natural I had overcome, in reality I had stuffed away tightly.
I don't like confrontation.......
My eyes are opening more to "Christ love", not natural love. This maybe a little harder than I expected.
Oh boy have my eyes begun to open......
"Christ love" is to love ALL. From your family and friends, to those who hurt you, use you and abuse you.
Yes, He expects us to love ALL~
I thought I had shown His love to those that had hurt me, broke my heart, and tore me down.
I prayed for them, that's love right?
Hummm, not so much....
I said a quick few words of prayer and yet still harbored my anger and hurt.
Is that really showing the love of Christ?
No, not really....
"Love must be sincere, Hate what is evil; cling to what is good".
To have the love of Christ, we must be sincere. We are instructed to hate what is evil,
we are not instructed to hate the person.
I never saw myself as hating the individual, and I truly believe and know from the depth of my heart that I do not hate anyone of God's children.
Extremely irritated with some....Yes~
However the evil that I have hated has spilled over into unforgivness for certain individuals,
and in return
I have allowed my anger to continue to burn deep down.
(Once again, stuffed down tightly)
Where I thought I had forgiven, I had not.....
Where I thought I had shown love.....
I did not......
So here we go, me and my heart are now being opened and exposed in all the areas I had hidden away.
And I can now see how any and everyone that could possibly rub me the wrong way,
hurt my feelings, get on my nerves, break my heart, anger me with their words,
has now come across my path!
There are times I do not find Gods sense of humor funny during a life lesson,
however I can hear his voice
saying, " we will continue to do this until you get it daughter" :)
As my journey continues to be more like Jesus and less of me, my prayer today is for us all to seek to love as Christ does.
For all of us to allow our daddy God to crack open our hearts and remove all the unforgiveness, anger, and brokenness we have stuffed tightly away.
For the grudges we thought we had let go, but still lurk somewhere deep in our hearts.
For any anger we may have left to fester,pretending it's been resolved.
To walk in Christ love with our eyes wide open....
To be used as an instrument of HIS love~