Jul 9, 2012

I am still......."Stacey Wilson"

Yes...this is a very OLD picture of me. :)

It is from my high school days when I was a proud BHS Babe in Blue. 

Don't cha just love that 80's hair do ?
More like a poster child for Aqua net hairspray :)

 I loved to dance and still do.
Friday night football games were my favorite .

I was a outgoing, loud, blunt, didn't meet a stranger social butterfly. I never ran with just one crowd, I had several I went through high school with.

So many of my friends remember me as this girl.....
And rightfully so.....

 From the age of 11 until graduation, I grew up with a pack of boys...literally.
We lived in an a townhouse growing up and there wasn't many girls my age, so the boys became my side kicks...
OK maybe I became theirs as I was the only girl and they had no choice but to let me tag along.
I was stubborn that way :)

My boys loved me, treated me as a sister and always had my back.
Of course as all "siblings" do, they gave me grief in a way that only "brothers' can do. :)

My time growing up with them all holds very precious memories and love for each one of them.
They are my brothers!

After graduation, we all went our separate ways to build careers and families.
It was a couple of years ago at a high school  reunion we all came together again~

We talked about our present lives and relived our memories of mischief and fun as kids.
( talking about the old days always brings a smile to my face)

We have stayed in touch since this night and over the last few years have been there for each other through some of life's ups and downs.
Once again my "brothers" are there for me as though time never had separated us~

Last weekend I was able to spend some time with two of my brothers, one of them had just heard through the grapevine of the ministry God has brought me to.

He was surprised.....Very surprised. Well more like disbelief.
I got tickled to hear him say..." I had to hear it from you" and then his next sentence....

"Really? Stacey Wilson??!!" Wow!

 OK by now I am really laughing......

Through my laughter at his amazing surprising, came a huge hug and his last sentence...
" I am happy and proud of you"

No one that I went to school with would have ever imagined or believed that "Stacey Wilson" would be in the ministry and I understand.

Why you may ask?

Because they knew me when..........

They all knew me when talking about my faith was not something I did in public amongst my peers.

They knew me when I made some really messed up decisions in life.....
When I was confused and believed I was unworthy of any kind of love....
When I allowed my rejection syndrome to take over and "partying" was my escape.....
When I ran from life's sorrows instead of facing my giants......

When the world was more important to me than the love of God........
They knew me when...........

I can see where it would be hard to swallow that "Stacey Wilson" is no longer that girl...
I was her for such a long time...........

Becoming a mom , becoming a wife, going through a divorce,and watching those you love fade away will change a person.

(For me my eye opening moment came when my first child was born)
Time for me to grow up and go back to my roots.....My roots in Christ ~

I found in my trials and tribulations the only way for me to survive and be victorious in this life is through my relationship with Christ.

It is through the LOVE of Christ I am who I am today.

During our conversation, my longtime friend and brother confessed to me he had not called me the last few times he was in town as he was uncomfortable with this "new" Stacey.

In reality I have always been this Stacey. I, in the past, was scared of showing this part of me. The enemy will have a person to believe by doing so, you will be alone in this world. The enemy had me believing those who knew me when would judge, mock and make fun of the person I am through Christ.

I allowed that fear to consume me.....

I crumbled to the world's stinkin' thinkin' instead of shining with the love of Christ.

So who is this "new" Stacey?

I am still loud, blunt and the social butterfly. I still love to dance and enjoy a good glass of wine.
I love my family and friends unconditionally, without judgement or criticism .

I will still be there through the dark times and the good times. I will come running when someone needs a shoulder to cry on, or just a hug and smile.
 I love hanging out with my old friends and my new friends. I don't discriminate over religious beliefs nor do I walk around telling others what is wrong in their lives......
( I believe in relationship with Christ and demonstrating love through that relationship)

I am not exempt from having a bad day, or losing my cool when I get overwhelmed. I can get irritated just as the next person can and there are times when  I speak before I think...


 I have been known to have to apologize for speaking out of turn, hurting someones feelings and being stubborn.
I am not perfect and will never claim to be. I will fall in this life and make my share of mistakes......

However......yes there is a "however"~

Instead of running away.....I run to Him.

Instead of feeling rejected.....I allow Him to love me.

Instead of bad choices tearing me down.....I get back up and try again.

Instead of viewing the world in a perspective of disgust .....I see a world that needs love.

Instead of allowing unforgiveness to poison my heart......I see another person hurting as well and forgive quicker than I use to.

I am still a work in progress.

The only difference between now and then.......

I know who I am in Christ. I know were to run when things turn upside down.
I know who to cling to when my life seems like it's falling apart.....
I know who to be thankful to when blessings and opportunities pour into my life.....
I know  I can talk to him, my daddy God  without the fear of rejection and judgement.....

I know without a doubt that my daddy God loves me and there is nothing or no one that can separate me from his love~

 I am a woman with a purpose....To show Christ's love to so many who feel that are unreachable, unlovable and unworthy to be loved.

To go forth as a testimony of God's grace, mercy and love.....

I am still "Stacey Wilson".......

I am HIS child and for that I am grateful beyond measure~

Much love,

2 Corinthians 5:17

Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

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